The First Presidential Non-Debate

Astonishing. They agree to a forum with veterans and the armed forces, but they won’t be on the stage at the same time. The rules are that you should not talk about your opponent, only your plans. They flip a coin, Don wins, he chooses to go 2nd.

Unknown if he says “ladies first”.

Hillary comes out and is immediately hammered with 5-6 questions about her email server when she was secretary of state! An IT question, with continued followups? So she goes out and she bats them down — I was told to consider my own managed server for non-classified stuff (by Colon Powell himself), it was several years ago, I took the advice of my tech and security people, nothing was classified, the state department gets hacked too, in retrospect it seems like a mistake, yada yada yada.

Email sucks — How about everyone in here give ME details about their email servers from 2009? Anyone? Bueller?

She never really recovers because she’s on the defensive, and touting her considerable foreign affairs experience comes off as bragging. Physically everything seems fine. She still has a shrill voice and bug eyes that wander around like she smells a fart but overall she seems healthy for her age, still sharp as a tack.

She slogs through gaining the respect of the crowd and then makes way for the spectacle that is The Don Trump.

Drumpf — What a draft dodger looks like entering a room full of veterans.

But wait, what’s this? No We Are The Champions?* It’s humbleTRUMP.

He slogs in with his shoulders down, walking crooked, making his pouty face.

I know his act. It’s because the room is full of real american heroes he is too afraid to act out. People of all races, religions, creeds, colors, and beliefs, and all of them more capable to be president than him. Sometimes his embarrassment shows on his face.

Cheetos Jesus — I was against the Iraq war. But the military then was strong. Now it’s nothing but losers. Thank’s Obama. Plus we should have taken Iraq’s oil. Whatever happened to “To the victors go the spoils?” Well there were no victors there, just saying, but we should have taken the oil……. or something like that. I’m fabulous. It’s fabulous oil.

He starts with a glare when he’s informed of the rule to not attack his opponent. Then a dumb joke turning to a minimum into two a minimum?, random facts mixed with lots of fantasy, and a surprising lack of bragging for The Don.

He’s replaced that bragging with attacks on his opponent, of course, because he was told not to. When chastised for it he simply says Barrack Obama and Hillary Clinton instead of Hillary alone. He cares nothing for rules, facts, or logic. His arguments are based on emotion and ignorance only.

He knows about as much about the world as your drunk uncle, but he’s rich so he’s actually dangerous and allowed to function with such theories. For the love of money he gets away with ridiculous notions.

Hit song by the band Queen, played by Trump without permission at the republican national convention during the introduction to wife Melania’s speech, which used exact lines from Michelle Obama’s speech 8 years earlier. Queen was led by a Farrokh Bulsara, a gay man of Persian (Iranian) descent who’s family relocated to England as political refugees, and you know better as Freddie Mercury.